Staying True to Yourself as You Work Towards a More Outgoing You

Man holding a mirror in the desert.
Stay true to yourself as you shed your social anxiety. Getty / Saul Landell / Mex

So you want to be more outgoing? Whether you want to make new friends or land a dream job, being charismatic is only one step to becoming a social butterfly. While it may be cliché, self-acceptance is a large part of being charismatic.

Creating a goal will give you the motivation to take more risks. Experimenting socially may give you a boost of confidence when it comes to talking to others. Lastly, by taking more risks, you will open yourself up to new experiences, which will help you become more outgoing.

Self-acceptance is not something that can be achieved by staring into the mirror for 15 minutes. The only way to become truly comfortable with who you are is to get to know yourself. This can be done by asking yourself questions such as:

"What do I enjoy doing?"

"How can I make myself happy?"

Addressing these questions will give you an insight as to how others may perceive you.

If you can see yourself for who you are, you can more easily present yourself to others. Are you trying to land a high-paying job at a prestigious institution? Maybe you just want to make friends. Whichever may be the case, setting a personal goal is vital in boosting your charismatic ability.

Visualizing something that you desire will help you push for it.

Imagining yourself employed at your dream job will push you to takes risks that you otherwise would not.

The same can be said when your goal is to make new friends. If you go to a party with the mindset that you are going to meet at least one new person, you will think more about completing your goal than your shyness.

This tactic works well for people who are very organized or driven.

Social experimentation is simply trying new things. If you have never gone to a large public social event, try it. Try participating in local volunteer groups as well. Experimenting with what you do in your free time is an excellent way to learn news methods to initiate contact with others.

You do not have to make a permanent habit of attending such events (unless you discover that you enjoy them). Feeling out different social settings will give you tools that you need to better gauge how to approach different situations.

Taking risks is a large part of accomplishing anything. Stepping out of your comfort zone can be hard. Perhaps you have a fear of rejection.

Although it is understandable to fear rejection, you should not allow it to control larger aspects of their life.

Every risk not taken is a missed opportunity. Rather than avoiding rejection, learning to deal with it is better.

Overcoming shyness or social anxiety is not an overnight process. It can be a long and difficult road at times.

However, by accepting who you are, setting personal goals, experimenting with yourself socially, and taking risks, you can begin to build upon your charisma.

Being a little more charismatic will open many doors of opportunity for you. However, it is important to remember to be true to who you really are.

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