6 Consequences Bully-Victims Experience

Understanding the Challenges Bully-Victims Face

School boys (10-13) in classroom fighting, one boy hitting the other, bullying
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While there are six types of kids who bully, perhaps the most perplexing of these bullies are bully-victims. Not only have they been bullied, sometimes ruthlessly, but they also bully others as well. Most people would assume that a victim of bullying would instead have empathy for others and not inflict pain on those that are weaker. But that is not the case with bully-victims. 

Understanding Bully-Victims

Bully-victims are often born after being repeatedly bullied.

As a result, they are attempting to regain a sense of power in their lives. The victims they are target are usually more vulnerable than them, which allows them to feel powerful and in control.

Bully-victims are more common than you might think. In fact, a large number of bullies have also been victimized themselves. Bullying other kids is a way for them to retaliate for the pain they experienced. Other times, bully-victims come from homes filled with domestic violence. Or they may suffer abuse at the hands of an older sibling. In these cases, bullying is a learned behavior.

What’s more, most bully-victims are typically loners or are at the bottom of the social ladder at school. This fact contributes to the bully-victim's sense of powerlessness and anger. As a result, they often appear hostile, which keeps them in a position of low social status and perpetuates the cycle of bully-victim.

Consequences Bully-Victims Experience

Being both a bully and a victim is not easy.

Consequently, it is not surprising that bully-victims often suffer significantly. Here are six ways bully-victims are impacted. 

  1. Suffer more psychological stress. Compared to other types of bullies and more passive victims, bully-victims suffer more emotional stress than any other type of bully or victim. They also suffer more from anxiety, depression and loneliness. As a result, they may be at a greater risk for emotional problems including psychosis, substance abuse, and anti-social personality disorder.
  1. Have trouble fitting in. Bully-victims often have a harder time socially than their peers. They also are less cooperative and less sociable than those around them. And, they are more likely to be avoided by their peers. Most of the time, bully-victims appear to be loners because they often have a few, if any, friends. Research suggests that both their bullying behavior and the frequency of which they are targeted by other bullies leads to this social isolation.
  2. Struggles in school. Some research suggests that bullies who also were victims of bullying are more likely to feel unsafe at school. They also are more likely to assume that they don’t belong or fit in. As a result, these kids often have trouble following classroom rules. They also are less engaged in their studies. Much of this distraction comes from the emotional turmoil they are experiencing from being both a victim and a bully.
  3. Cannot manage emotions. Often, bully-victims may unintentionally prompt children to bully them again because they react intensely to name-calling, threatening behavior and conflict by lashing out. Because of these challenges with managing emotions, controlling anger and dealing with frustration, they are often predisposed to being bullied over and over again. They then turn and inflict pain on others, and the cycle continues to repeat itself.
  1. Respond to stress aggressively. Because these kids have been bullied extensively and often respond aggressively to bullying, some researchers have found that bully-victims are more likely than other bullies to carry weapons or believe it is acceptable to bring a knife or a gun to school. What’s more, these kids have a general lack of trust in the goodness of the other people and appear more high-strung in their relationships. For instance, a bully-victim lives in a heightened sense of awareness, waiting on another person to attack or bully them, and preparing to respond with aggression. This makes them appear defensive, hostile and unfriendly and isolates them further from others in school.
  1. Experience consequences of both bullies and victims. Bully-victims often experience the same effects of bullying as other victims. For instance, they may struggle with depression, anxiety, eating disorders and post-traumatic stress disorder. They may even contemplate suicide. Likewise, they also experience all the dangers and risk factors that bullies experience.

​Overall, being both a bully and a victim is not an easy situation for a teenager to be. If your child is both a bully and a victim, it is important that you find a counselor another expert to help your child deal with the conflicting emotions surrounding their situation. 

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