Does Your Child Have These 7 Predictors of High EQ?

Kids with these 7 predictors usually deal with bullying effectively

group of students smiling

Have you ever noticed how some victims of bullying barely flinch when someone attacks their character while other victims seem to struggle to cope? One factor that helps people deal effectively with bullying is a high emotional intelligence or EQ.

This ability to identify and manage emotions can create the resilience and perseverance needed to overcome bullying. What’s more, it also can help deter bullying as well.

Here are seven predictors that your child has a high EQ and may be able to deal with bullying more effectively than other children.

1. They don't dwell on the past.

Kids with a high emotional intelligence, do not dwell on the bullying they experienced yesterday. They also usually do not fall into victim-thinking and they do not get bogged down by their mistakes. They also do not seek revenge or hold grudges. They find it very easy to let the past stay in the past and forgive the kids that bullied them.

2. They focus on the positive.

Kids with high EQs would rather spend their time problem-solving than dwelling on the negative sides to bullying. They are very good at reframing their thinking and focusing on the things they do have control over – like their reaction to bullying rather than the actions of the bully. They also may spend their time trying to come up with a way to use what they learned from this negative experience in a positive way.


3. They know how to set boundaries.

While people with high EQs may seem easygoing, they actually are very good at knowing their limits and establishing boundaries with people. They also have no problem saying no and they regularly defend themselves against bullies. They also know how to stand up for themselves.

4. They know their strengths and weaknesses.

Emotionally intelligent kids know what they are good at and what they are not so great at. As a result, they are always working to improve in areas they know they are weak. What’s more, because these kids know themselves so well, it does little to affect them when a bully targets them. They are secure in who they are and have a solid self-esteem.

5. They are self-motivated.

While it is important to involve adults when they are bullied, kids with high EQs are already thinking of ways to deal with the bullying before they ever talk with an adult. Instead of dwelling on what happened to them, they are focused on how to address the issue and move on. They also exhibit very good self-advocacy skills.

6. They are not perfectionists.

Kids with high EQs already know they are not perfect, so when a bully targets them they are not as phased by it as someone who strives to be perfect. Instead of dwelling on the bullying or allowing it to define them, they learn from it and move on.

7. They are empathetic.

Empathy is the hallmark of an emotionally intelligent person. In fact, being able to relate to others, show compassion, and take the time to help others are all crucial components of emotional intelligence.

Additionally, being empathic makes people with high EQs curious about other people. As a result, it is not uncommon for a kid with a high EQ to wonder more about what is going on the bully’s life that would lead to the bullying than what he actually experienced. In fact, kids with high emotional intelligence have a greater capacity to understand why a bully bullies than most other people. 

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