How to Stop Over-Thinking

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If you are living with ADHD, you are probably familiar with the concept of ‘over-thinking’. It’s when your thoughts get caught in a loop, and you go over and over the same thoughts without feeling better or finding a resolution.

Your thinking might get stuck on day to day worries, or on future events.  However, a large portion of your over-thinking is probably to do with events that happened in the past.

Whether it was something that happened last week or decades ago, you keep wishing you had done or said something different.

Feelings of shame or regret sweep over you. Because your brain works faster than people without ADHD, you can do more thinking loops than your non-ADHD peers. This means you experience more of these negative feelings.

It is helpful to reflect back on a situation and see what worked and what you would do differently next time. On the other hand, over thinking is damaging and can result in sadness or depression. It can make you feel anxious and lower your confidence in your ability to navigate the world.  It can also make you less social because you are self-conscious about what you say and do.

Even if you have been an over-thinker your whole life, you can change!

Here are 4 suggestions to help.

1.     What Times Do You Over-Think?
Notice the specific times in the day when you do your over thinking.

 For example: in the shower, driving home from work, etc. Then, create a plan to stop the over-thinking before it starts. You might set a timer for a 4-minute shower. That way, you don’t have a chance to get lost in thought. In the car, you might listen to an engaging podcast.

2.     What Are Your Triggers?
There could be triggers in your life that make you more likely to over-think.

For example: feeling sad, sleep deprived, hung over, or stressed. You might not be able to completely avoid those things, but if you know when you are more likely to over-think, you can be more vigilant during those times.

3.     Active Processing
While over-thinking isn’t good, actively processing your concerns or worries is very helpful. Sit down with a pen and paper and write down everything that is on your mind. On the other side of the paper, write down anyconcrete actions you could take that would help. For example, if you constantly worry about doing presentations at work, join Toastmasters. If you need to plan your vacation, break it into small actions  to take. Such as rent a car, book a hotel. If you over-think the past, is there something proactive you can do, so it doesn’t happen again?

4.     Distraction
Even after you have created a plan addressing your concerns, you might still over-think; which is where distraction is helpful. Create a list of possible activities to distract yourself; rather than over-think.

These activities need to be compelling and interesting enough for you to engage in them fully rather than thinking. What works for one person might not work for you, so personalize your list. Here are some suggestions:

·         Have a conversation with friend

·         Watching a film or TV show

·         Play  a computer game or board game

·         Exercise

·         Perform an act of kindness for someone else

·         Listen to music

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