How to Tell Your Parents You're Pregnant

A Guide for Teens

Teenage girl sitting on bed with pregnancy test
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Every year there are millions of teens who worry about being pregnant. Many of them do indeed become pregnant. This means that you will eventually face the question of how to tell your parents you're pregnant. So when you ask yourself, how do you tell your parents you're pregnant? Here are some helpful tips:

Enlist Support

Having to face your parents a lone may be too much for you. Consider having your boyfriend, your brother or sister, a friend, or an adult you trust stay with you while you tell your parents that you're pregnant.

They can provide you with moral support.

Pick a Good Time

Be choosy with the timing. It is never a good idea to tell your parents you're pregnant as they, or you, are on the way out the door. You will want to find a time that allows you a fair bit of time to talk, even if you don't use it. By not trying to squeeze it in quickly, you stand a better chance of having a good conversation. Remember they will need time to digest what you have told them.

Be Receptive

Your parents may offer you advice. This isn't necessarily bad, but it can be annoying. Be prepared to tell them what you need from them. Statements like, "Mom, what I really need from you right now is to simply love on me and be my sounding board while I work this out." Your parents might also offer you advice for something you had not considered. 

Be Patient

Sometimes the advice that you receive might seem like a directive. Remember that they are processing everything you have just said and are probably saying the first thing that comes to their mind.

While it might be easy to jump on it or argue, remember that it probably took you a bit of time to understand and process what's going on. They also need time and maybe space. Don't take this as a bad sign.

Be Ready for Questions

The questions may start flying as soon as the news is out. Who is the father?

When did this happen? Did you use birth control? How long have you been having sex? Calmly give them the answers that you are ready to give and as for the rest simply say that you're not ready to talk about it.

As frightening as it may be to talk to your parents, remember that they do love you, even if in years past they have made statements like: "I'll kill you if you ever get pregnant" or "If you get pregnant, you're out of the house!" These are often not based in reality and are likely not what the outcome will be. While you may fear that they won't love you if you are pregnant, it's simply not true. They may be hurt or angry, but that is different from not loving you. During this difficult time, you may also want to find another adult who is not your parent that you can talk to, even if it is a professional counselor.

Now you can have them help you figure out many questions like will their insurance cover you and/or the baby? What are your living arrangement options? What will you do about your education?

Try not to be overwhelmed - it's really one step at a time.

Once you have told your parents you're pregnant, you will likely feel a huge weight off your shoulders. Remember that you will need a lot of support and love throughout this process. This is not really a one and done conversation.

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