Lube is Not Lazy

Lube is for the Lively

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It might be a sticky subject, but moisture is essential for comfortable and satisfying sex. Though the “right” amount of the slippery stuff varies, you know when you’re good to go. But there’s no reason to wait until the conditions are just right. With a squeeze-bottle or tube within arms-reach, any time is go-time. Surprisingly, 35 percent of women have never tried lube during sex. Much of this may be the result of misinformation and sadly, lube shaming.

Apart from being untrue, calling people who use lube lazy leaves a lot of women feeling like there’s something wrong with them, their partner or their sex life. The truth is, many factors contribute to how much natural lubrication a woman produces on her own that have nothing to do with arousal or readiness. There are even some extra spicy activities that list lube as an essential ingredient—so why the hate? Read on to find out why lube is one of my favorite little helpers.

Lube Adds Enjoyment

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Some women don’t naturally lubricate very much at all, with one third reporting vaginal dryness at the start of penetrative sex. While dryness is definitely uncomfortable, it can also lead to more serious results like tearing, soreness and yeast infections. It is always important to make sure enough time is spent on the warm up phase of fun, but if you’re dying to get hot and heavy and your body isn’t cooperating, there’s no reason to grin and bear it.

Even without these kinds of barriers, lube can be your best friend in the bedroom. This slippery supplement can make sex better for everyone, increasing the chance of orgasm in both men and women by a whopping 50 percent. That’s right, 50 percent. Instead of depriving yourself of potential pleasure, slip into something more sensual and grab a tube of lube!

Lube is Part Of The Act

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Let’s face it: some bedroom activities should come with a list of accessories. For example, a good lubricant is essential for anyone using toys or engaging in anal play. Sex toys are made from synthetic materials like silicone, latex and glass and lube can greatly enhance not just the toy’s effectiveness, but also its lifespan. Find a product that pairs well with your toy—water-based options are generally safe to use with most devices and they’re incredibly effective. Even our body’s naturally-produced moisture may not create the most ideal, smooth environment needed for mind-blowing, playful lovemaking. But the right amount of lube is often the missing ingredient that pairs perfectly with you, your partner and your play.

Similarly, lube is suggested when going through the backdoor, as the rectum is inclined to tear if not treated with care. A little added moisture can help you relax, making the whole experience more likely to be comfortable and pleasurable. If using a toy for rear-entry, make sure to cover both the device and its point of entry first. While it’s certainly a matter of personal preference, thicker consistency solutions are popular for anal play. Though remember, lube should be used as an assistant to help things along; never rush an activity one of you may not be ready for.

Lube is a Bare Necessity

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There are many reasons why a woman may not be sufficiently lubricating naturally. Whatever the reason, for these women lube is a game-changer. Psychological factors like stress, grief and depression can leave a lady lacking her usual slip. Also, women who have a history of sexual abuse or rape may feel emotionally ready to have sex, experience desire, but find their bodies unable to biologically respond. For these women, shaming is especially harmful. A little bit of lube can help cross that barrier from a challenging to a pleasurable experience.

Common prescription and over-the-counter medications like antidepressants, birth control, ​and antihistamines can also make achieving usual levels of moisture impossible, as can  treatment for serious conditions like cancer. Some women find themselves experiencing a dry spell where previously there was always smooth sailing. It’s common during pregnancy, post-baby and normal hormonal changes in the course of life for women to experience vaginal dryness. There’s no need for fear; natural lubrication often returns with time or after these circumstances change. In the meantime, make lube your new BFF.

A Note on Lube Types

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Not all lubes are created equal and it’s essential to find the product that is right for you. For most couples, water-based products are recommended, as they are won’t stain sheets, don’t damage condoms and rinse off easily (taking lingering bacteria with them). Petroleum-oil-based products should be avoided if you use condoms, as they can erode latex.

While flavored lubes may be a tempting novelty, they can cause trouble down there because they disrupt the delicate Ph balance of lady parts, sometimes leading to infections. The best products for a healthy vagina don’t contain glycerin or sugars; you can even find totally natural and organic brands.

A final tip: a little goes a long way! Don’t over do it, as too much of this good thing can actually decrease sensation. Reapply as often as you need. Slip, slide away! You can thank me later.

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