Sex During Pregnancy and Pregnant Orgasm

Everything You Wanted to Know About Pregnant Sex But Were Afraid to Ask

Husband listening to wife's belly.
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Pregnant sex can be a touchy subject between couples. The rule is to follow your desires and really open the lines of communication. Over the course of the years, I've been asked many personal questions about sex during pregnancy, and pregnant orgasm, here are some of the questions with answers.

Q. Now that I'm pregnant can I still have sex, and if so, for how long into my pregnancy?

A. Sex in pregnancy is wonderful!

You can continue to have sex as far into pregnancy, right up until birth, as you and your partner are comfortable. This includes orgasms. There are a few reasons why you shouldn't have sex during certain periods during pregnancy. These include:

Be sure to talk to your practitioner about specifics for you. When your practitioner says, "No sex." Find out what they mean, do them mean no orgasms? Do they mean no intercourse? If so, for how long? For example, if a woman has a slight bit of bleeding in the first trimester, it's common to be told to avoid intercourse and orgasm for the period of one week from the last episode of bleeding.

Positions for Pregnant Sex

Q. Now that my belly is growing we're having a harder time having sex. Any suggestions?

A. Be creative! While many people tend to prefer the missionary position for sex during pregnancy, it becomes a very difficult maneuver to perform as the abdomen gets larger.

Try some of these pregnant sex positions:

  • Woman on top. This allows you to control the depth of penetration, and the majority of the movement. You can go as fast or as slow as you'd like while controlling the depth of the penis. This position works really well throughout pregnancy and at the very end of pregnancy.
  • Spooning. This position gets its name from the way spoons fit together in the silver ware drawer. Usually, it's best if the man is behind allowing his penis to go between your thighs and enter you from behind. This creates no pressure on the abdomen and allows for a shallow penetration. Many women find this a very relaxing position for sex during pregnancy, and it can be used throughout.
  • Hands & Knees. This is a very good position for pregnant women again because of the lack of direct pressure on the abdomen, although as your get larger your belly may actually rest on the bed. Some women find this difficult at the very end of pregnancy, depending on how high they are able to hold their belly off the bed and still allow for penetration.
  • Side lying. This can be kind of tricky, but it can be done! Lay on your side with your partner facing you, try pulling one leg up to allow room for your partner. This may get tiring after awhile, and may not be easy for the last part of pregnancy.

All of the above-mentioned positions also allow for manual stimulation of the clitoris either by yourself or your partner.

This can greatly increase your chances of becoming multi-orgasmic, not to mention it's a lot of fun. They also prevent the mother from laying on her back, which is not recommended after the fourth month of pregnancy (16 weeks gestation).

When you're trying to think of a good position, try it, if it doesn't work stop. Creativity will be a lot of fun during pregnancy, and it will probably carry over into your postpartum sex life as well when creativity becomes important in a different way.

Pregnant Orgasms

Q. One word, orgasms.

A. Many answers to that one! Orgasms can be much different during pregnancy. Some woman will finally become orgasmic during pregnancy due to the increased fluids in the area making the clitoris and vagina more sensitive. Other women will become multi-orgasmic for the first time.

In general, orgasms are very good for you and baby! When you have an orgasm the baby is unaware of what you are doing but does experience the euphoric hormone rush that you will experience. There will also be minor contractions of the uterus, as there have always been, but now that the uterus is bigger you can feel them more. This is not preterm labor unless you have this cramping sensation or contractions for more than one hour.

The big problem with orgasms during pregnancy is that, particularly at the end, you many not get quite the sense of relief that a normal orgasm would provide. I've personally walked away from sex feeling more sexually frustrated than before, despite multiple orgasms. Although, it's still worth it!

Q. Can I masturbate? Will it hurt the baby?

A. Masturbation is a great release of sexual energy. I highly encourage this for women. It's also great to have a session of mutual masturbation if you're not interested in penetration. Masturbation is also a good thing to think of if only one person in the relationship is interested in sex at that particular moment. It allows your to be sexual without having to have sex for whatever reason, and yet your partner (or you) can enjoy a release of sexual tension.

Q. I've heard that oral sex is dangerous. Is that true?

A. Oral sex is not dangerous for you while pregnant, with one exception, don't blow air into the vagina. You'll read this a lot of places, but I personally don't know anyone who blows air during cunnilingus, maybe I'm missing out!

Oral sex can be very pleasurable during pregnancy, particularly if you are fearful or simply do not wish to engage in intercourse. It's a great way to try and express your sexuality without sex. There is an increased discharge during pregnancy, this is not harmful to either of you. If either of you is bothered by this you can simply wash yourself prior to engaging in these activities.

Q. Can I have anal sex while pregnant?

A. That's a tough one. Not many people have studied this, and in general, I would say that if you've engaged in this prior to becoming pregnant there should be no difficulties, but listen to your body.

If it hurts stop. It may also be more difficult at the end of pregnancy as the baby's head engages into the pelvis. We often forget that the only thing that separates the vagina and the rectum is a piece of skin. This may make anal sex more painful at the end of pregnancy.

Q. Can I use a vibrator while pregnant?

A. Does anyone want to do a thesis on this one? Seriously, I've been asked this question a number of times, and there isn't a clear-cut answer out there. So I'm going to rely on the end result: orgasms.

Orgasms are safe during pregnancy, with a few minor exceptions. Watch for continual contractions of the uterus, and other than that you should be fine. Of course, it would also be good if you could ask your practitioner about this topic as well. They will have more knowledge of your personal medical history. If they say no get specifics on why not, to ensure that it's not personal bias.

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