5 Things to Say to Your Tween

5 Things Your Tween Needs to Hear

The important things tweens need to hear.

 Your child is growing up and you may find that communicating with him is harder than it was just a few months ago. Tweens are stuck in between childhood and adolescence and while they try to find themselves they may pull away from mom and dad. That's OK. It's perfectly normal and it's all a part of establishing an identity apart from yours. Still, it's important that your tween hear a few key comments from you.

Below are five things you should communicate to your tween, so that you keep the lines of communication open, and let your tween know how much you care. 

5 Things Your Tween Should Hear from You Today

I Love You: You can never say it enough, I love you. Be sure your tween knows that your love is not something he grows away from, or will loose just because he's growing out of childhood. Share your feelings with your child so that even when you have an argument or a disciplinary problem, he understands that love and concern is at the center of all of your interactions. Try to keep certain family traditions going through your child's tween years, as a way of sharing experiences and family history.

I'm Proud of You: Middle school can be tough and even students who excelled in elementary school may find the middle school years challenging and difficult at times. If your child tries hard, but struggles, he still needs to know how proud you are of his accomplishments and his efforts.

Your support and admiration may be all he needs to get through the challenges ahead of him, in middle school, high school, and beyond. 

Try New Things: Timid tweens may be reluctant to give something new a try, but they should embrace opportunity and possibilities. Encourage your tween to roam from his comfort zone a little, by trying new foods, giving a new hobby a try, or signing up for a class that he may not think he'd be interested in.

Trying new things can make life interesting and rewarding, and your tween needs to know that. 

Use Me as an Excuse: Chance are at some point in the next few years your tween will be exposed to things such as drugs, alcohol, smoking, sex, and reckless behavior. Let your child know that he can always use you as an excuse to say, "No." Instruct your tween on how to tell friends that he can't do something because, "My mom may find out" or "If I get caught I'll be grounded for life." Giving your child a way out of dangerous behavior could be the best gift you ever offered. 

It Will be OK: When you're growing up even the smallest of disappointments can seem life ending. Tweens aren't terribly resilient, but you can help your child overcome the downs in life with a little love and some consoling words. Distract your tween when you think he's having trouble coping with a bad grade or a relationship problem. Let him know that you're there to talk, when he wants, and that you're sorry he's upset.

Reassure him that many problems don't seem as terrible with a little time and distance. Your tween can make it through the tough times ahead, with your help and encouragement. 

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